As much as I put out there, as much as people know, there is so much more I keep inside. I have a whole side of me out in California, a family I never met and am getting to know because of facebook, and now that I am slowly getting to know them, I am thinking, why did I think this would be so hard? Why did I cautiously step forward like I was stepping in cold water?
I knew since I was a little girl, that a part of who I was, was my family out there. I never thought I would know them, or they would know me. Then it happened, connections were made and slowly I am getting to know them. I have a cousin who is also a writer. I have an aunt who is a sweetheart, an uncle with a strong heart. I wonder now, did I inherit any little trait from any of them? Do I raise my eyebrow like this one, or laugh like that one?
I am thankful today they are in my life today and look forward to meeting them all someday. This proves that love is deep in your heart. Deep inside you know who is a part of you, a facet in your life, especially when you can feel fascination and love for your family, and you've never met.
Yet.
Everything is so beautiful today. Everything with my life, my kids are with me, my cat, there is no humidity in the air, we have food to eat, the BeeGees are playing right now, and the sun is shining through the trees with the utmost will to shine on me.
And that is another facet in my life.
2 comments:
Dana,
I am so glad you finally made a connection with them. Family, no matter what are a part of us.
Even the family that share no blood.
I give thanks every day that my adoptive Dad had the sense to know I'd WANT to know my surviving family members as I grew older. Thanks to him I grew up living in one world while having my feet firmly planted alongside those of my cousins in the world that created me physically. Now I'm blessed with two families.
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