I am alone. I have children but I am alone. I made many mistakes in my life, that maybe contributed to my being alone...and I wonder how it will be to just be...with me.
My grandma is moving away, well in my world she is my grandma and in your world she is my great-aunt. Her two sons lives miles away from her. I am slowly inheriting all her knick knacks, ceramic owl collection (::shudder::), her dishes , plants and artificial floral arrangements. She is moving in with one of her sons. When I asked her why she was moving she was "Last weekend I didn't even hear my own voice, you have no idea how that is."
I didn't say anything, maybe silently cursed someone who may have caused her epiphany of sudden flight....but I realized...WOW....that is lonely.
I treasure my alone time, I do. I awake early just to capture it for an hour or so....
But I wonder if someday, that alone time will be convenient...too convenient. Will I come to regret it and not want to get out of bed early because of the silence I so treasure now?
I know I am still young, but that is a scary thought.