Monday, March 12, 2007

Time Keeps on Slipping Into The Future

That's the beginning of a Steve Miller Band song.
It scares the hell out of me...well I mean not where I am all weird and shaking and crap but it scares me to think of time slipping into the future. And the way they sing it is so ominious sounding.

I turned 35 this year and have not sat down and thought about that until last night. I think here I am at age 35 not even close to where I thought I would be ten years ago.

I am a single mother of four kids.
I am unemployed.
I could lose a few pounds and have not even started my diet from LAST year's resolution.
I will be attending college for sure in the fall and NOT to be the teacher I always thought.
I seen my two oldest boys turn to teenagers this year. I have 5 more years of school with them, before they go off to be on their own.

All that scares the hell out of me.

A friend and I are researching into opening a store here in town. I have to write a business plan and the tribe will give us a loan. there is no store, Amazingly, here that sells beads or crafts.
Our meeting with the Lakota Fund Foundation is tomorrow, wish me luck.

Anyway, time keeps on slipping into the future...I guess...uh. lol


Alissa said...

You know I've had those same thoughts, but I have to remember that if I had followed my life plan, exactly the way I wanted, I wouldn't have my kids, my schooling, or my career path the way they are now, and I wouldn't change now for anything. Keep on, keepin' on.

Janet H said...

God, I couldn't be further from where I thought I'd be now, and I've got forty breathing down my neck. Don't get me wrong -- I do like my life. A lot, actually, which is kind of surprising when I remember how much the idea of this life felt stifling and awful. Like you, lots of my choices were made for my kids, and those are the choices we just can't regret. I think you eventually just have to realize that life is what happens when you're busy making other plans and get on with it. I think you should open that store, Dana, though maybe you should let someone else be in charge of organizing the beads. ;-)

Missy A said...

doesn't matter when you do it as long as you do

JohnB said...

c'est la vie dana...

Dorid said...

lets see if my comment FAILS to crash today...

Don't worry about "going with the flow" my motto has always been, if you see something better, grab it. It seems like a store would be a great idea. It seems like a no brainer in fact. The best part is that it would be YOURS to mold into whatever you dream. Sounds cool.

Webby said...

Most of the times I've followed my gut feeling. Sometimes I went against it and that never turned out very good..