Thursday, November 29, 2007

Who gives a rat's ass?

Damn I couldn't get online for like 4 hours last night.

Ok, I exaggerated, I couldn't get on Multiply....for like 40 minutes . I was pissed.

Anyway, about like ten years ago, I was single, sharing custody of my two boys with my ex, and bartending, not to mention I had just lost like 50 pounds so life was sweet. Just like my weed. I used to be a pothead back then, I'm not now, although I admit, if passed a doob, I take a hit...but that's it. Anymore than that and I am a paranoid freak.

Anyway this was when my ex had the boys and I was young and kinda on my own.

But I remember, I used to have this Jamacian friend named Junior, and that was his first name he said he had 7 cousins named junior. I didn't believe him and had to confirm it with my other Jamaican friend Mark who told me he had 4 cousins whose first name's were Junior....anyway one day Junior called me because he needed a ride to work. My brother was getting ready to go to the mall because back then, he was managing the bar and was a clothes horse...he needed a new tie for work or something. So we pick up Junior in my brothers shitty CRX and i crawl in the crawl space under the back wondow. On the way taking Junior to this wood flooring factory he lights up a spliff.

My brother don't smoke so he passes it to me. I take one, two, three, shit i don't even know how many hits I took.

so we go through this road block and cops are stopping people and telling them something or whatever. I freak. i almost peed. I was like "Junior swallow that joint!"

He was like "Fuck it mon, I smoke when I want to."

I was like "I am not going to jail, gimme the joint, I will swallow it!"

"Dana mon, quit freaking out, you need to relax, that is the whole beauty of smoking the buddha is to control your emotions and relax...there is a saying in Jamaica...blahblah blah blah...." *inhale*

I try to make myself as small as possble as we go by the coppers. Junior is blowing smoke out of his air vents and singing some Marley as we go by to the cop...we are all Cheech and Chong up in the CRX, he sings "~Excuse me while I light my spliff
Good GOD I gotta take a lift~"

So we take him to work as I am thanking god and promising I will NEVER get high again, and I didn't for like 4 hours too.

So on the way back, my brother coaxing me I crawled in the passenger seat, he stops at the mall to go buy his ties or whatever that metrosexual wannabe was buying...he gets out of the car and looks at me. "Let's Go!"


"What the fuck?"

"I'm wearing my sweats." I say and look down.

"So?" He looks at his watch "I ain't got time for this shit Dana."

"Go." I say and look away through my half lidded eyes.

"Shit, get the fuck out of the car, who knows how long I will be in there."

"I'm high, man." I say.

"Well no shit fucking duh."

"I don't wanna go in there man. People will know." I say.

"What people?"

"Those people."

"People you don't know, high society fucks you could give a rat's ass about? People who don't give a fuck about you...who gives a rat's ass what they think? Get the fuck out of the car and let's go!" He slams the door and walks away.

To this day I don't give a fuck what people think. It's my life. Oh and I am not a pothead anymore.

~~~~~~Easy Skanking~~~~~~~


Alissa said...

That's funny, I've had experiences similar to that, with the paranoia and the shifting eyes like *they know, don't they* but they never did, because when I got older and didn't care, I asked, and nobody ever knew...And I'm not a pothead anymore either... Don't you just love doing the responsible adult thing...

Edwin in Kyle SD said...

Ha! thats a good story! Makes you think now.. did this experience make you who you are now?? or what?? I like it, you have hours and hours of enjoyable reading! I have not been here in a long time. I need to catch up!