Wednesday, January 23, 2008

An Old Tabloid

So yesterday AL held me at staplepoint and made me confess to a minor crime I commited in the passion of the moment or however you say it. This was an old challenge from Myk on 360 to write a tabloid story about yourself.

What would your tabloid say?

Dana Dane Found Out....mugshot unearthed!!

After intense investigation by the tabloid staff, who were tipped off by various angry ex-boyfriends and one ex-booty call....this mugshot was uncovered by our investigative team.


Sources tell us that in the summer of 2005, Dana Dane was walking from a small casino to her mother's house in Pierre, SD. After winning a sizable jackpot and drinking beers with friends, Dana Dane was said to leave the Longbranch Saloon at approximately 1:48 am.

Matilda Hockenback, a waitress at the time says this "she was so sweet and was so happy when she won her $250 jackpot, I never would have guessed she would commit such a crime when she left here."

A house on 1048 Park had the best lawn ornament collection back then. Gnomes, Fairies, and Turtles...oh my!

"I seen her." said the creepy man that lived next door. "She picked up the turtle and walked away like it was nothing."

A close friend of the family was able to take a picture of the lawn ornament in question.(see above pic.) She was told that Dana Dane was going to return it a few nights later but her mother fell in love with it , thus starting a burning desire to collect many turtle lawn ornaments. (Which, ironically do not sit on her lawn.)

Who knew we had such a notorious criminal amongst us.....May the lord forgive her possessed soul!

Now please tell me yours! NOW! Or your lawn ornaments will never be safe.

1 comment:

The Black Hornet said...

I told Dana Dane that once he stopped rapping he'd get into situations like this. Damn fool!