Monday, April 30, 2007
Coasting a Hang Over
I am coasting a hangover this morning. Not a bad one, just a slight one. Yesterday I bought myself a bottle of Chardonnay, Fat Bastard by Thierry & Guy, it was delicious. I invited Aimy over and Heather showed up with two of her kids. I made a pasta salad and BBQ-ed some ribs and chicken.
We drank the whole bottle. They had never tasted wine before. Or Heather said she did out of the box. I just wanted them to see how it was to cook out, enjoy some wine and not party like most people do around here.
This morning as I went for a walk I thought about how we couldn't sit outside and drink a glass of wine without risking going to jail or feeling the guilt of enjoying a bottle of wine. If I didn't explain alcohol is illegal here and anyone caught drinking it will automatically sit 8 hours in the drunk tank at the jail.
I admit I drink a beer to watch my Yankees on TV or when I BBQ. I don't let it get out of control and I don't want it to. There have been times in my life I did drink too much, but that is the past.
But I was thinking this morning as I went for a walk how many people let it get out of control. This reservation is a so called "dry" reservation.
I don't see dry, I see people with no hope. People who start drinking things that kill them faster because they feel as if there is no hope, no body cares, or whatever reason that drove them to be so dependent on alcohol so bad that they hang out outside of grocery stores. They ask for quarters, dimes, anything to go towards there next drink. It is so sad really.
I give them money, I don't know why....I pity them, I guess. I know some people say "Don't give them a thing!" But I keep my change in my drink holder in my car and kind of use that for them.
So as I was driving home I was thinking of things my mom sid to me the other day about people never sobering up and what a joke it was that this was a "Dry" reservation.
She asked me what i would do if I didn't know how to bead.
I don't know, I told her ...probably be like everyone else and pawn all my shit and not have things like this computer or my kids wouldn't have games like many many people I know down here.
She then told me she don't think treatment works for people around here. They get sent away and filled with hope and return to this so called dry rez where there are no jobs, they have no skills. They come back and their hope for a new life slowly diminishes. They turn back to drinking to forget all of it.
My mom taught me so much....she used to be the director of an alcohol and substance abuse treatment place in town for years and she seen alot. She told me the worst thing to do was to "judge" people for what they did with their lives.
Does this reservation being dry solve anything? No.
Will it ever change? Probably not. Maybe if alcohol was legalized...but who am I to say? I just remember reading about the PRohibition and how crime and alcoholism rates went down when it ended. (BTW, if you don't know me I am fascinated with that era!)
Will I ever be able to drink a glass of Chardonnay here without guilt? Probably not. :)
Anyway those were just my slightly hungover thoughts lol.
The picture above I took from Old Hospital Hill this morning, when I went for a walk at the track. I love the sunrise and was blessed to see it this morning. i also plan on doing a blog soon about Whiteclay, Nebraska. The border town...not really a town that sells beer. Second highest beer sales in Nebraska. I am doing a story for the paper this week about an organization in Whiteclay that has a thrift store and is starting a co-op for crafters. But I would also like to write about Whiteclay in my blog...a second part of the town and people that live there.
Ironically this song was playing on the radio when I drove home after my walk....lol...yeah I have a twisted sense of humor